School...

I decided to go to school this semester.

I was planning on deferring until spring 

Since I was having a baby and all...

BUT

then about a day after the new semester started

and I started seeing all of the posts on Facebook about first day of school

I started to get a little excited!

Like I always do on the first day of school :)

Then I remembered that I wasn't going to school

and as awesome as having no homework was going to be

a part of me kind of wanted to be in school

learning 

and growing 

So I started looking at classes

I found enough classes online to be considered a full time student

and on a whim I registered right then and there

That day I felt pretty excited

and a little scared

But now I'm starting to think I was crazy!!

I love school and I love learning

By taking this semester I will graduate a whole YEAR earlier than if I didn't

And I love the feeling when I am really busy and I seem to get so much more accomplished than I ever think that I can!

PLUS because of scholarships and financial aid I actually make money by going to school!

Sounds like a win-win situation to me!

But today I realized why going to school scares me so much

I'm scared of not being here for my little Blake

I mean its all online so I'll still be here

but sometimes I might not BE here if I have an extremely long paper to write 

... or something like that.

Its so hard because when he is awake I just wanna play with him

and when he is asleep I want him to be asleep on my chest all cuddled up! 

Or I just want to stare at him while he dreams...

So I have a little bit of a dilemma 

I'm already committed to this semester

and eventually I'll need to finish school anyways!

So I think what I'll do instead of being scared of missing baby time...

is put school on my second priorities list

and be scared about my grades instead

I'll soak in all the baby time I can

Cuz I'm thinkin that one is WAY more important than the other.

I'll still be giving school my all 

But I'll be giving Blake even more than that!

Anyways, here is the cutest video clip from yesterday!

He's happy squeals are to die for! 

Ps. don't mind the big wet spot on his shirt... He is the master of spit up